30 Days of Truth: Sex


30 Days of Truth, Day 15: Something or someone you can’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

As we all know, I need sex. There is simply no way for me to be my full, alive self, without it. I have, however, learned some things about this need, and the healthiest ways to meet it. I have learned that I need sex with someone who respects my boundaries, and practices safe sex (with me and with others).

I need sex with someone I actually like, and who actually likes me, because as much as I enjoy getting laid, the before and after is just as important.

I need sex with someone who makes me feel safe and comfortable. Whether it is a one night stand, a friend with benefits, or a genuine relationship, I need to know that they have my emotional and physical safety in mind, and that they are not going to trample me just to get what they want.

I have also learned that while I can enjoy one-night stands and random hook-ups, I would much rather be with someone who is invested in me…and that the best way to get this is not to stumble upon it by random chance and hope for the best, but to get to know someone before it gets sexual, to make sure that we are both in the same place, and want the same things.

As someone who is highly sexual, and even addicted to sex, it is even more important for me to have boundaries and rules. It is far too easy to be swept up in the burning desire to have someone inside me, to the point where I am acting as though sex is a foregone conclusion–as though I have no choice in whether I have sex, and what I do during sex.

Addiction notwithstanding, I do have a choice. I always have a choice.

My body, my choice.

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