The End?Posted: February 7, 2016
He says they broke up.
I can’t gauge much from a text.
He says he can’t talk about it yet.
I say we should take a break. Maybe she will be more willing to work on herself and the way she treats him without the stress of our relationship. They can go to counselling–three months, six, a year. They can approach it from a different place, without jealousy crippling their (her) ability to reason. They can rebuild, or fail, but know every possible measure was taken. We can wait until we know for sure that they will work, or that they are doomed, before he lets it end.
He says it won’t help. He says it’s too late. He says she had already made up her mind–that she needs to be away from him.
I feel nothing. I feel numb. I am in shock.
I am going to be sick.
He says he is sorry–this will be hard on our relationship. It will shake us–the blast radius.
I tell him not to worry about me. I tell him I have his back.
I don’t know what to think.
Maybe this isn’t really happening. Maybe they will fall into each others arms tonight and vow to make it work. Maybe he will tell her of my offer. Maybe she will take it.
Maybe the kids won’t have two Christmases. Maybe they will still take vacations all together. Maybe they will eat dinner and play board games around the same table into infinity.
Maybe that’s what I want. With or without me.